Mi Hermano, Mi Oido...

By now you should have opened your Christmas present containing the address for this website. I fear I have a little explaining to do.

Firstly, 'Mi Oido' doesn't mean ‘he who goes before me’ in Spanish. I explained this earlier in the blog so anybody tuning in will know but unfortunately I couldn’t cascade the message to your level until now. Sorry about that.

Also it’s important to note that there was a scoring system involved with the receiving of postcards every week. I got a point if you didn’t reply and you got a point if you did. Texting me to tell me your cat was sick wasn’t sufficient but a text to reply to a postcard or even to say you received it was adequate. To see if you won have a look at the final score in last week’s post.

I couldn’t have done this alone. The postcards have come from various places and people and I have been updating the good people of Twitter every week as I know you don’t really use your Twitter account. Our epic battle has been mentioned by scores of people including a certain Danny John-Jules who has RT’d the link a good few times. This, along with contributions from some incredible artists, has brought the viewing figures for the blog to this:

You may notice that this is my most viewed blog ever and that includes the time I had to run a marathon.

I hope this clears up any questions about my mental wellbeing and I also hope you’ll take the time to scroll through and see the comments from each postcard. I have thanked the contributors but feel it would be pertinent for you to do the same; after all, you got to keep their work.

Thanks for playing…keep in touch.

Your bro,

Terry

Week Fifty Two

This is it, the final postcard, which means the final score is 47-5. My parents always told me to end on a Venn diagram so that's what I'm doing.

I feel this week's postcard needs explaining. The general gist is that I wanted to annoy my brother by targeting our professions. He's a paramedic and I'm an electrician and suggesting that my job is in any way above his will send him into some kind of weird meltdown. Of course rocket scientists are imperative but it could be argued that the reduction in space programs during economical crises reduces their importance slightly. Likewise I have met site labourers who regularly complete The Times crossword but I have also met some who can't function without constant input. Not all paramedics are lazy. What I'm trying to say is that this isn't a definitive example but it should annoy my brother sufficiently and that's why we're all here, surely.

'All here' refers to the 5,598 views that have occurred to date. I have finally dismantled the big pile of unused postcards that I've had sitting on the side for the year and it was nice to read through some of the letters and cards I've received from contributors. If you haven't already and you find time I would implore you to take a look at some of the dynamite postcards we've used this year.

I'd like to take this final opportunity to thank everyone who's been involved, contributed, shared, retweeted and generally stopped by. My next post will be directed towards my brother and I will put that up next week in time for him to open the quillow that guides him towards this site. Stand by...

Week Fifty One

My friend was babysitting last night and I asked him to doodle on a postcard for this blog, offering either credit or anonymity as necessary. I came back to a blank postcard and so I had to draw something myself. Before I'm accused of degrading women, the stripper is actually male.

The score of 46-5 is representative of the lack of contact this week but is much higher than I initially thought he'd get when I started. In one week it's the anniversary of the idea and in two weeks I'll be writing the outro so be sure to tune in for that. It's hard to believe I only have one more postcard to send.

What are we going to do next year? Answers on a postcard please.

The viewing figures look set to exceed 5,500 this week, a massive thanks to all who have read and promoted the blog at any point. Here's a half naked stripper for your entertainment.

Week Fifty

A big thank you to Mrs L for this week's postcard. So, so appropriate right now.

OK, here's what happened. I took Mrs L out to watch a panto on Thursday night. When I returned to the house where my mother was babysitting I was greeted by my father and brother as well. We were very surprised to see him despite the fact he said he'd be down before Christmas.

Worse than that I took the afternoon off on Friday and we picked up some beer at 1pm. We stopped drinking at 11pm. At some point during this time he reiterated that he was keeping the postcards I'm sending for when I get sectioned. He is standing all over my whitewash victory and twisting it into the ground. 45-5 is flattering but doesn't give the correct impression of the game.

There are just two weeks left and I can barely take the tension that's not even really there. I want to know how he will react. If possible I will record the phone call, if any, that I'm hoping will occur on December 25th.

Week Forty Nine

I thought I'd get my brother a souvenir of the Christmas light switch on in Helston and found this one - but what kind of psychopath glues postcards to fudge? I rescued it as best I could but it's still sullied. I could have sent the fudge as well but...you know...

The score is 45-4 after yet another quiet week. At least I have ascertained that he is receiving the postcards and there are only three weeks to go before he opens his big Christmas postcard quillow and finds out everything. I'm like a small child at 4am on the 25th of December which I believe is some kind of public holiday.

Week Forty Eight

If you've been keeping tabs, and chances are you're £2 down at this stage if you have, the correct numbers for last night's lottery draw were in fact 2, 3, 5, 15, 22, 29 and a bonus of 26. Oops. Still, we're all winners in that my brother didn't act upon this information or, if he did, he didn't get in touch to complain and so the score is a very organised 44-4.

This week I am celebrating the annual tradition that is @MooseAllain's colour-me-in advent calendar which you can download here: http://www.worldofmoose.com/pages/world-of-moose-advent-calendar-2104

It's a cracking load of fun and something that you may even consider letting your children loose with (as long as you have enough ink to print their own separate version as they'll only do yours wrong!).

We've only got four weeks of postcards left but the good news is that we're over 5,000 views...in fact, thanks to a mention from @Bookcunt, we're over 5,200 views. I will post a photo of the official stat on the last post which will be written directly to my brother. Stay tuned.

Week Forty Seven

I couldn't help myself this week, I'm basically trying to see how many people I can get to buy a lottery ticket given that they already have the winning numbers. Check the postcard this week for those details.

The score is 43-4 but, if my brother buys a lottery ticket and wins millions of pounds based on these numbers, I will officially be the biggest loser in this competition. The odds are 14 million to one or thereabouts, mind.

Still, I'm off to buy a lottery ticket.

Week Forty Six

While I was in London my brother filled me in on his busy life. During the last week I have seen this in action as he's not sent me so much as a text message. Normal service resumes.

The good news, other than my point this week which takes the score to 42-4, is that I found the Longleat postcard. It's difficult to send postcards from the location I buy them from as I have to scan them in - I'd hate to get complaints from you all regarding the lack of pictorial postcard evidence.

It's hard to believe there are only six weeks left. We're a bit disappointed that we won't see his face when he opens the quillow on Christmas Day but we'll settle for a phone call. Knowing my brother he'll agree to phone later in the day and forget. Fortunately I won't, though.

Week Forty Five

There's a lot to get through this week so let me start at the beginning. Mrs L and I have been working on a way to tell my brother why I've been sending him the postcards this year. By that I mean I asked her to make a quillow with the web address on it and this is what she came up with:

This has been wrapped in Christmas paper and has now been hand delivered to my brother. Regular listeners will know I went up to spend some time with him this week which also meant I could take my son to the Tottenham vs. Brighton game. While at my brother's house one of the postcards turned up:

You may now be thinking 'Ah, he has this week's point' and you'd be right, but he doesn't get the point for talking about postcards after the postcard turned up; that happened on the Wednesday. On the Tuesday Mrs My Brother brought up the subject subtly, to which my brother joined the conversation and tried to get my reasons for the sending the 'weird postcards' out of me. All I told him was that they aren't weird and, after he incorrectly quoted the story of the sea, I corrected him. Now he and his good lady think I have memorised every postcard.

I may have mentioned this before but my brother's good lady thought I was sending the postcards as a cry for help. It was suggested that I was depressed and reaching out to him in such a way that I wouldn't be embarrassed about my situation. I am happy to report that I am not depressed and am purely sending the postcards to get points. This week the score is 41-4, my own fault for going up there. However, it was great to meet up with them all again and to spend some time with my niece who, despite being a bit of a talker, referred to me as a chatterbox. 

We went from my brother's house to Longleat to spend a couple of days with my family, meeting up with my wife and children at the park. While there I got a great postcard of a giraffe sticking his tongue out which is in a bag somewhere and so I have had to go with this one for this week:

Week Forty Four

The sentiment is obvious with this one. I may have stolen that first sentence from a Star Wars film and, if so, I apologise.

The score is 41-3 and I'm getting the impression my brother isn't even trying. Nevertheless, I'm staying at his house for two nights this week - Tuesday and Wednesday - and I may well be there when this one turns up. I should work on my excuses today but will probably ask him who it's from and suggest that more people should be sending postcards.

Mrs L is working on a device that he can open at Christmas with the address of this blog on it so that he can see what we've been up to. I will include a screenshot of the page view numbers as it's getting close to 5,000 so be sure to tell everyone just to nip over to the site. Also this is the last chance any of us have to submit a postcard or two to be included. If it features your artwork or even some text then it will be more than welcome.

Week Forty Three

The Seal Sanctuary in Gweek sounds like a place you might visit if you just want to see some seals...however, you'd be wrong. Although seals are present (for the Trades Descriptions Act if nothing else) they also have penguins and starfish and sea lions and, at this time of year, seal pups which are great to keep the children entertained. More importantly their gift shop has postcards so I bought one. For my brother.

No response from last week brings the score excitingly up to 40-3. My temptation to produce a line graph showing the points rising has been stemmed by my realisation that no-one would really look at it, let alone take in the detail it depicts. Apparently this doesn't make you philistines, it makes you normal.

Here's a picture of a clown fish that isn't Nemo, although predictably they have referenced the celebrity fish on the back. Philistines.

Week Forty Two

Big thanks to Christine from Iesha's Attic in Helston who donated this week's postcard. There's no better feeling than walking into a shop and hearing "I'm glad you're here - I saw this and thought of you". It's even better if they don't pull out a hatchet and start chasing you around the shop with it. I guess, anyway.

Things have gone back to normal this week with the level of communication reading zero. I'm glad I didn't do 'giant gift boxes to my brother' or the points would have set me back enough for a remortgage.

This means the score is 39-3 with just ten weeks [UNTIL CHRISTMAS] to go.

Week Forty One

It was all going so well and then this happened:

What has happened since is that we've moved the Longleat trip and we are still going up to stay with my brother and watch the football. However, more importantly, he's gone and got himself a point.

The score is now 38-3, yet another blemish on my whitewash victory. Here's Jamie Bear to provide this week's psychological discussion.

Week Forty

This week's postcard serves as a subtle reference to the fact that people on the internet like cats. I don't think they've enjoyed this much popularity over the years and yet they don't even realise they should be making the most of it.

There are 12 weeks left and the score is 38-2. The views are hovering around 4,500 so another 500 will get me to my ludicrously set target of 5,000. I've been thinking about the big reveal and I've decided I will send a postcard, wrapped in a big box, for him to open on Boxing Day to save ruining his Christmas.

It also looks like I'll be going to stay with him at the end of October which came about through an opportunity to watch my football team playing football. While there I will snoop around and make sure he received all of the postcards, assuming he's kept them all. In the meantime feel free to send a few contributions, particularly if they include your own artwork as I can give you a bit of a plug.

Week Thirty Nine

After last week's surfing bear I found this week's surfing person postcard and couldn't resist making some mundane comparison between the two. I like to think that everyone would think in this way but that is most likely a diversionary tactic to stop myself realising how peculiar I am.

My brother has just had nearly a month off work on holiday (thank you, Facebook - no point for him) and is returning back this weekend. If I took a month off he'd miss four postcards so, being a paramedic, I hate to think how many patients he's going to have piled up when he gets back.

The score is a very healthy 37-2 and, thanks to a mention from @MooseAllain this week, we've had nearly 4,500 views. It looks like Christmas is very much coming early for me this year, massive thanks to everyone who's here, shared and contributed.

Week Thirty Eight

I had to send @Mrs_Lyvit to the shop for this week's entry as I'm running a little short of postcards so all of the credit for this week goes to her. I'm sure I'll find an appropriate way to thank her.

I'm surprised we still have so many loyal followers considering the one-sided nature of this competition. I can only hope this means you're all on my side as we watch the New Zealand All Blacks play a team of Premier League referees with no whistles in the world of extreme postcarding. If that analogy doesn't work for you then maybe this is Muhammed Ali against an ignorant fern plant. 

36-2 is the score. I don't expect to see him for the rest of the year as he's only been down once that I'm aware of and his potential journey down last July seems to have been forgotten. His posts to Facebook are a gentle reminder that he's still alive so at least that rules out the possibility of him walking into a crocodile enclosure with a burger and chips in his hand.

Here's a bear surfing to celebrate my impending colossal landslide almost white-wash victory.

Week Thirty Seven

Having moved house and finally getting the new place straight all of my attention is now back on sending my brother postcards. This week's is from @TinkSaid who supplied enough postcards for us to do another year, although his lack of response suggests it would be unwise to do so.

I set myself another mini-target and that was to get 5,000 views. We're up to a very satisfying 4,000 so far and I'm looking forward to his guaranteed response once he finds out around Christmas-ish that he's being followed by people all over the world.

Ultimately the all important score stands at 35-2 and it would take either a TARDIS or Delorean for him to win now. Insert evil laugh in here.

Week Thirty Six

So this is me, up to date. The score is 34-2 and he will continue to receive 'weird postcards' for the next sixteen weeks.

If you have any spare then why not donate them to this worthy cause?

Week Thirty Five

I have had no internet access for a week or two so this postcard went a little late. This is all due to a house move that I am currently recovering from.

I have heard from my brother but only to confirm that he wants two Dukes of Hazzard boxsets from me so no point there. 33-2 and another post to follow immediately.

Week Thirty Four

This week we've got another gem from Beck @new_toon. I wish I had half the talent he has for cartooning; instead I have to put all of my efforts into writing this blog.

We're halfway through moving and I'm a bit worried we won't have the internet for a week or two so I'm going to have to be creative in getting the postcards to you all. I hope you'll forgive me if I have to do a double week or something similar.

He's gone quieter than a mute church mouse in slippers under the leg of a piano recently and I have no idea when I'm next due to hear from him. If I don't tell him our new address I may never hear from him again which will be...well, not unusual. It's 32-2 and all's well. I hope you enjoy this masterpiece.

Week Thirty Three

There were two reasons I couldn't send this postcard straight from Wales this week - firstly, I didn't have my brother's address, a rookie mistake in the world of Extreme Postcarding. Secondly I didn't have access to a scanner so that I could show you all my hard work this week. There's no point spending all this money on my brother if there's no-one reading my...er...art.

As I type this my sister is sat on my sofa. I'm confident that if this was Postcards to my Sister I would not only be behind but I'd be losing drastically. We've discussed what I'm going to do with my life next year once my brother has stopped talking to me but we didn't come up with anything conclusive.

The points keep flooding in, this week it's 31-2. Apologies for the late post, normal service will resume this week.

Week Thirty Two

There are photos of dolphins all over the press despite the fact they're a pretty common sight in Cornwall during the Summer. I guess they have to fill their pages somehow and they're biding their time before the first dolphin attack occurs; make your own jokes about them bottle-nosing someone.

Nothing is working when it comes to provoking my brother, almost as though he has become habitually used to seeing a postcard through the door every week. Will he need counselling when it ceases at the end of the year? Am I giving him Christmas every day only to rip it away from him when he becomes dependent on it? I will endeavour to let you know.

The score is a delicious 30-2 as it stands. I'm away next week so may not get my post done in time due to lack of access to a scanner but I will be sending him a postcard from our travels just to liven things up for him. I'm possibly the best brother in the world.

Week Thirty One

Thanks to Kent @Taylertoons for this week's postcard, delightfully showcasing The Mummy's Shroud. I haven't seen the film yet but it's on my list of films I've heard of now at least. The young lady looks suitably horrified but I can empathise with the Mummy as I know how hard it is picking bones out of fish that I'm eating, let alone human sized bones. Nightmare.

I tried to get my brother a point this week to save his blushes when he finds out and I honestly thought that sending him a postcard for his birthday would invoke a reaction, however the phone was silent and there was nothing online. Just to double check that he received it I sent him a message saying "I hope you got your birthday card" to which he replied "I did, thankyou".

He is not getting a point for that.

This means the score is 29-2 and he's going to really have to up his game if he wants to close the gap. Perhaps The Mummy's Shroud will be one of his favourite films?

Week Thirty

It's my brother's birthday today so I've sent him an extra big postcard to celebrate this momentous occasion. He's 21, but not really. I only hope the postman doesn't steal the two £50 notes I put in with the postcard.

I've spent the week following my win on numerous talk shows, with editors of magazines and newspapers and talking to the foreign press about my strategy. This all occurred from my padded white room in a secret location where they keep people like me. It's very secluded.

I thought my brother would be down this week but he hasn't turned up...either that or he's avoiding me. I guess his points will have to come via text or phone calls like the other two have. 28-2 to me and climbing.